Time for a little drama...

ok so, today really would've been an OK day. well, the day itself was ok. went to movie with family, did some stuff, went to see the new bollywood movie (WHICH WAS AWESOME) and got to hang out with some relatively good people. now it's time to let off some steam.
hey, mary, it really was not cool to go to mom and dad and biatch about how i downloaded donnie darko, and to keep bringing it up. i don't know what kind of weird sisterly world you live in. it's not like i was smoking pot or drinking or swearing. you know, you could've let that one slide. and by not doing that, you just proved to me how heartless you can really be. bravo! now mom and dad have taken my mouse away, and everyones being really nice to me. but it's ok. i figured out how to navigate around my computer with a mouse or without.
to anyone that cares, i'm so effing sorry if you don't like my new "eye make-up" or my new "attitude" or if you don't like how "i'm rebelling." and i don't want to hear the words, "what happened to the good, sweet spirited julia we used to know?" again. because i'm sick of hearing it. and i'm sorry that i'm not meeting up to everyones expectations and i'm so sorry that i'm not being the perfect kid i used to be. maybe it was a bit wearing after a while. perhaps? i don't know. just an idea.
i'm sorry that i have an addictive personality. to everyone. i'm sorry about that. really i am. maybe, maybe after locking myself in my room and not really talking about my real emotions to people, maybe all i want is some kind words. annd i'm kind of not getting that. the few people i actually do talk to about my real feelings are either too self absorbed to care (no offense, but it's true) or they live really busy lives and don't have time for my pesky problems (no offense, it's true).
my posts are always a tad bit dramatic, and this may be overwhelmingly so, but a kid can only take so much before they lose it. and i think i'm losing it! i don't know if school will help or make this worse... i simply don't know.
i'm just really really tired. i'm tired of people who think they're they have the right to believe themselves to be higher than me. i'm tired of all the people who wish i was my old self, and all of those fake people, and all of those really airhead texas people. i'm sick of the south, and the ugly ugly yellow green fall colours here, and i'm sick of everything and everyone. everyone around me. they've all just pushed me to some serious limits.
oh and also. i'm still feeling rather sick. just the little... cherry on top.